Weaning off Paxil day 7 I think.

I felt depressed, and sad this morning. Then I got over it. I thought to myself "If I was taking Paxil, I would be numb, and not feel these feelings, I would be numb. I wouldn't even deal with these feelings. People could walk all over me, or I can be fake with people, and just be numb." Then I thought when you have anxiety, you're having a fight or flight reaction. This is a signal to the brain something is wrong. When anxiety happens, I need to listen to my body, and find out why I am reacting like this.

Day 6: Weaning off Paxil:

Feel much better. Paxil may have been causing me to feel depressed. I woke up, carless. Instead of feeling depressed or hopeless about it, I am fine with it. I would get an empty feeling. I think it was messing with my biochemistry. Glad I'm weaning. I wake up feeling great!

weaning of Paxil

Most of the time, I feel really good. I think it was the Paxil causing anxiety. I think my biochemistry is normal, I need to work on emotional/environmental that causes it. That is healthier, because it always comes back, and I need to deal with it. I think that since I've been taking it on and off again for 10 years, I reach a threshold, where it no longer works, and I end up in bed for two months. I can't take something that has a hold on me like that. It's like taking drugs, but prescription. It's like it controls you.

I say my biochemistry is normal, because, my blood work is normal. I read that fish oil, (omega 3 fatty acids), and flax seed oil, increase serotonin. Also, if I get anxiety, I can take 5htp, but I'd rather use cognitive behavioral therapy. Exercise increases serotonin. I gained weight, probably because "the drug" quit working on me. Well, I am going to try fish oil, 3 times a day, and flax seed oil, along with exercise.

I started taking Zoloft, when I had Isabelle. I acted anxious, because I had a c-section awake. I could see what was going on in the reflection in the ceiling, because they has a glass mural of nature. Then the next day they gave me Zoloft. I guess I felt I needed. I felt relieved of depression, and anxiety, and lost tons of weight. When I think about it though, I can do this for myself. Changing my thoughts, applying self control, diet exercise, eating right. Well, the past is the past, and now I can change.